Going from Matching to Meeting: Tips for Texting While Dating
Single people of all ages are looking for love online, with nearly 30% of adults reporting they’ve used a dating website to find a connection. While most can agree there are ups and downs with online dating, plenty of people have found love. What’s the secret to going from matching to meeting? According to Date Coach Emily Dodge, one of the best ways to move your connection forward is consistent, fun, and purposeful communication.
Chatting on the App
Kick off the conversation with a comment or question based on the person’s profile. If they like books or music, ask what they’re reading or listening to currently. Skip the throw-away questions like “How is your day?” or “How was work?” If you’re looking for quality of connections over quantity, it’s worth it to make an effort to stand out in the first few messages.
Getting a First Date
Spend about two days chatting on the dating app before asking for or giving out your phone number. If a woman gives out her number, the guy’s first message should be asking her out. Remember, the goal is to meet in person, not to become pen pals. Suggesting a specific plan will go a long way in getting a positive response. Rather than asking if someone wants to grab dinner, ask if they’d like to try a new rooftop bar or speakeasy you just heard about.
The Next Level
Even if a date is good, things don’t always move to the next level. Some people think they should get the next date on the books as soon as possible, but it’s better to wait a couple of days. Don’t go silent, though! Short, fun, easy check-in messages are crucial to building connections.
The day after meeting, reach out in the evening or after dinner. Texts should be light and funny and ideally will reference something that happened on the date. Try sending a cat meme or a YouTube video you talked about. Since the goal is to get the other person to respond, be sure to ask a question!
By the fourth day after the first date, either person could initiate a second date. As a woman, if you are thinking about a man, then reach out. Wait to be pursued means you might miss out on a great person. Again, put forth the effort to suggest a plan that will appeal to your love interest. “Found a new trail to walk, wanna go this weekend?”
Looking for more personalized dating advice? We offer a variety of services, from co-creating dating profiles to individual coaching sessions. Get in touch with us at Evolve Counseling & Wellness Center to learn more about our Date Coaching Services.